Your inner critic is bogus.
Many of my clients secretly worry that if they lose their inner critic they won’t be motivated to achieve their best.
This leads to an unconscious loyalty to the stories and guidance of our inner critics.
And it’s one of the biggest reasons I see people struggle to make change.
In fact, the voice of my inner critic was one of the big reasons I held on to perfectionism generally and “played it safe” professionally for over a decade. So, I totally get it.
At best, criticism is a judgement about strengths & weaknesses.
More commonly it’s just straight up disapproval of perceived faults or mistakes.
Thanks to our inherent negativity bias, it’s often negative.
Quick pause: Your inner critic already knows we are challenging her…What is she blurting out in your head right now?
Mine starts out kinda nice…
“You learn from your mistakes!”’
Then she gets a little snarky….
“How will you get better if you don’t know what you did wrong?”
And finally resorts to poking an old, deep wound…
”Fine, be mediocre – that’s probably the best you can do anyway!”
🤦♀️ ... My inner critic is a total jerk!
We have been taught that we should value criticism as a tool to improve.
But there are now studies that show criticism (inner or otherwise) DOES NOT lead to improvement.
In fact the research shows that criticism shuts down creativity, problem solving and flexibility.
It creates a neurological response that makes you less able to learn & innovate.
(For more on this check out, “The Feedback Fallacy” by Marcus Buckingham and Ashley Goodall in the Harvard Business Review March-April 2019.)
I believe our best work is inherently creative and our inner critics mostly get in the way.
Would you be willing to loosen the grip of your inner critic to make room for more creativity, aliveness and flow?
Much love,
Marijke Ocean