Are you craving more control over life? I've got 4 questions to help you.
We all crave a feeling of control. A sense that we have a say in the way our life unfolds.
Talking with clients the last couple of weeks, I've noticed that people are feeling like life is happening TO them. Unlucky events. Other people's irrational expectations. Fire drills. Difficult bosses or work cultures. Even our own personalities... seem to be conspiring to make life/work hard.
Each conversation was with successful, accomplished, and influential professionals. And yet at the beginning of our conversations they didn't feel in control, they felt burdened by things outside their control.
I've felt the "life is happening to me" suffering too. My daughter has been home sick from school. The pediatrician's office has been overwhelmed and was difficult to work with. The routines we've been establishing were disrupted. I was backsliding on some progress I had been making in physical therapy. I felt that circumstances were limiting my choices and it started to feel like life was closing in.
I am able to shift from this mindset and my clients can too. But how?
How do we shift from this feeling of getting whipsawed by events into a feeling of being a proactive creator, setting the course rather than reacting?
One of my favorite frameworks for this is taught by The Conscious Leadership Group. (I've recommended their book, the 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership in the past).
I got the super fun opportunity to discuss this framework/process on a podcast recently...hosted by a gracious podcast host, Alexander Kristensen.
If you are curious how I help myself and others shift, this podcast goes over 4 basic questions to ask and also breaks down key elements of conscious leadership in general.
Much love,
Marijke Ocean
P.S. I used to think I was better or stronger if I could figure out how to "get back control" all by myself. I've learned we are biologically wired to be better together. If you feel ready to get some support for this shift - consider coaching. You can feel like a creator of your life, rather than at the effect of circumstances. An explore coaching session is a free session with me to learn more about how coaching works.
P.P.S. If you've been doing this work for a while you may already know that getting "back in control" is only a stepping stone to greater freedom that lies beyond control. I've been dreaming up a future post about the difference between creating and controlling. I'd love to hear your questions or stories about this next zone of growth.